[Buffy having feels for Owen]
Buffy: Do you have any more copies of Emily Dickinson? I need one.
Giles: Buffy, while the mere fact of you wanting to check out a book would be grounds for a national holiday, I think we should focus on the problem at hand.
Buffy: Right. I’m sorry, you’re right. Vampires…[looks down] Oh…does this outfit make me look fat?
[Owen walks in]
Giles: [Suspiciously] What do you want?
Owen: A book?
Buffy: [patiently, to Giles] See, this is a school, and we have students, and they check out books, and then they learn things.
Giles: I was beginning to suspect that was a myth.
Just for the record: you were right, I’m an idiot, and God
Xander to Buffy after she kills Ms. French
(BtVS, Episode 1x04: Teacher’s Pet)
Buffy: [to Willow] Okay, don’t panic, I’ll warn [Xander about Ms. French]. But I need you to hack onto the coroner’s office for me…Autopsy on Dr. Gregory. I’ve been trying to figures out these marks that I saw on his corpse… I’m thinking they were teeth.
Giles: …Um, this computer invasion that Willow’s performing on the coroner’s office, one, one assumes it is entirely legal?
Willow/Buffy: [innocently] Entirely/Of course!
Giles: Right…Wasn’t here, didn’t see it, couldn’t have stopped you.
Okay. Factoid 1: Only the praying mantis can rotate its head like that. Factoid 2: A pretty whacked-out vampire is scared to death of her. Factoid 3: Her fashion sense SCREAMS "predator."
It's the shoulder pads.
We all need help with our feelings, otherwise we bottlePrincipal Flutie when escorting Buffy against her will to crisis counseling in Teacher’s Pet (BtVS 1x04).
them up and before you know it, powerful laxatives are involved!
Buffy: Do you know Miss French, the teacher that’s subbing for Dr. Gregory?
Giles: [smiling] Yes. Yes, she’s lovely…in a common, extremely well-proportioned way.
I feel good, Xander! I feel strong! I'm connected, man, to everything! I can hear the worms in the earth!
That's a plus.
Supporting Actress Appreciation Post!
Robin Riker plays Amy Madison’s mother, Catherine, in Witch (1x03). I’m personally a huge fan of her in this episode, especially her pulling off the terrified teen trapped in her mom’s body and cowed by her verbal abuse as well as the slightly-crazy mom in question. She does it flawlessly.
According to the BtVS/Angel wikia, Riker also “played another witch in the first season of Sabrina, the Teenage Witch [which Buffy references]. Additionally, Sarah Michelle Gellar was friends with Melissa Joan Hart, who portrayed Sabrina in the series.”
Buffy: It’s not Amy’s fault. She only became a witch to survive her mother.
Xander: Look, I don’t care why. I just care that you go on breathing.
[Joyce shows Buffy her own high school yearbook and Buffy winces at Joyce’s photo]
Buffy: Mom, I’ve accepted that you’ve had sex. I am not ready to know that you had Farrah hair.
Joyce: This is Gidget hair. Don’t they teach you anything in history?
So, we have no idea what caused [Amber's hands to burst into flame]. That's a comfort.
But that's the thrill of living on the Hellmouth! There's a veritable cornucopia of fiends and devils and, and ghouls to engage!
Well, pardon me for finding the glass half full.
You have a sacred birthright, Buffy. You were chosen to destroy vampires, not to…wave pompoms at people.
Episode 1x03: Witch
“This is madness! What can you have been thinking? You are the Slayer, lives depend upon you! I make allowances for your youth, but I expect a certain amount of responsibility, and instead of which you enslave yourself to this, this…cult?”
Giles, Episode 1x03: Witch